{"id":337,"date":"2020-08-03T03:46:34","date_gmt":"2020-08-03T03:46:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/demo.megathe.me\/test2\/vivienne\/?p=337"},"modified":"2020-10-07T19:21:17","modified_gmt":"2020-10-07T19:21:17","slug":"be-kind-to-those-you-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/demo.megathe.me\/skylab\/calvin\/2020\/08\/03\/be-kind-to-those-you-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Be Kind to Those You Love"},"content":{"rendered":"

We all know \u201cthat couple\u201d \u200a\u2014\u200a some of us know more than one\u200a \u2014 who are unkind to each other. Not in big ways, but rather infinite tiny ways. Little, countless cuts, every day.<\/p>\n

For some us, we are that couple.
\n<\/p>\n

We tease. We complain. We ignore. We nitpick. We nag. We neg.
\n\u201cNegging\u201d<\/a>, (a play on \u201cdenigration\u201d) for those not in the \u201cpickup\u201d community (i.e., most of us), is when you deliberately cut someone down while flirting in order to lower their confidence. It\u2019s for people who don\u2019t have enough confidence of their own.<\/p>\n

And while some people do it while flirting, there are way more of us who carry it on into our actual relationships and keep it going there, too. Except, in that space, we call it \u201clove\u201d, with it postured as though it\u2019s \u201cloving\u201d \u200a\u2014 \u200awe\u2019re all so quick to smile and nod and accept it as such \u2014\u200a but it\u2019s not. It\u2019s just a bad violation of boundaries, and insecurity.<\/p>\n

In one case, one of our friends didn\u2019t like her boyfriend\u2019s shirt. Okay. But the worst part was that he\u2019d deliberately tried to wear a shirt he thought she did like, thinking \u201cthe one she didn\u2019t like\u201d was a different one, but it turns out she didn\u2019t like either one and by the sounds of it, the guy had really messed up. But it was a perfectly fine shirt \u2014\u200a some kind of on-trend but tasteful printed button-down anybody in my office could wear.<\/p>\n

So while they were going back and forth, my partner and I were just sort of standing there like \u201cwow\u2026 who gives a damn?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Little, countless cuts, every day.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":72,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[5,6,7],"class_list":["post-337","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-art-direction","tag-consulting","tag-design","tag-education"],"yoast_head":"\nBe Kind to Those You Love - Kim Hyunsoec - Calvin Demo - Skylab - Responsive Creative Portfolio WordPress Theme<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/demo.megathe.me\/skylab\/calvin\/2020\/08\/03\/be-kind-to-those-you-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Be Kind to Those You Love - Kim Hyunsoec - Calvin Demo - 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